An Early Christmas Blessing

"The best surprises are those that come without even a single hint."

Nov. 20, 2010 - That was the morning that marked another milestone in our married life. Weeks before that day, I was feeling a bit uneasy at work, in my everyday life. I always felt nauseaous that I almost threw up everything that I ate. I then realized that I was a bit sensitive when it comes to smell. I often noticed how my seatmate in the jeepney smelled or even got irritated with the smoke coming from cigarettes.

From the whole week before Nov.20, I even climbed stairs, lifted heavy furnitures from third to ground floor, and I even joined a 3KM fun run. I never thought that I am pregnant not until people around me were noticing the symptoms that I kept telling them. So they convinced me to have pregnancy test.

By Nov.20 husband and I were supposed to attend a mass but I had a terrible stomach pain so he went alone and I asked him to purchase a pregnancy kit. I kept waiting for him even if I was in a hurry to urinate because the first drop of urine should be used for the test. So when husband arrived, I rushed to the comfort room and did the test. Deep inside me is an expectation that it will turn out positive, and lucky as we are, it really resulted to POSITIVE. I didn't know how to react and how to tell husband. Outside Mark was also nervous how it will turn out, so when I went out the CR, I just nodded and uttered, "POSITIVE".

We didn't know how to tell our families. My husband was also speechless not like the usual scenes that I saw in Tagalog movies that when a man discovers he's gonna be a father, he'll jump for joy and will shout to the neighborhood that he's already a dad. Mark was the other way around. He was quiet. Little did I know that he was already calling his mom and his sister. I was shocked and in disbelief at first. I was afraid to broadcast it at once because it may be false alarm, the kit may just be not real. Then I learned that Mark only bought it for 50pesos so I asked him to buy a more expensive one to confirm that it's really positive. But afterwards, the symptoms that I experienced for the past week confirmed that I really am pregnant.

So we couldn't wait to broadcast it. Mark was even the one to instruct me to take a picture and post it in Facebook. He even had the consciousness to put powder on his face, and me, I was still in awe.

It was five days ago since we first knew that I am pregnant and for that five days, it was totally a roller coaster experience. I was in pain for the past 4 days and it was only today that I felt good. I was advised to have a bedrest, and eventually, I even filed resignation. I couldn't afford to have a work but risk the safety of my baby.

So far, I don't have specific cravings. I just crave for everything that I see. My sensitivity to smell becomes stronger. I hate the smell of any cooking procedures especially instant pancit canton, sauteed product, and bellpepper. My emotions and mood swings are more recognizable these days. When I cry, I really cry hard that it's so hard for me to stop. When I'm happy, I'm totally happy. I feel more special these days because everyone's taking care of me, concerned about me, and exerting effort to give my cravings. This is one of the advantages of being pregnant. When my tummy aches, I couldn't stop from crying but I just think that God allows me to feel that way for me to be reminded that there is a life inside my system.

Truly this is such an early Christmas blessing and it comes to a real surprise. God is so good.


Sent from my Blackberry

Contemplating...

Lately, perhaps due to the changing weather, I've been contemplating about my life--- what am I now, what happens with my career, how am I as a wife, and what's in store for me in the future.


1. What Am I Now?

I am Mrs. Marjorie Jayne Pacis-Villamar, Mark Johnson's loving wife. That's how I only see myself, nothing more. Even the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Ricardo Pacis and an older sister to Ricky Jay and Neil Joseph, I don't see myself as those anymore. 

Oh yes, since I got married, I decided to relocate with my husband and leave the old me. I wanted to start all over again with my husband and begin building our own family. That's what I simply wanted--- to be the best wife and to be a mother soon. 

But why do I feel like I am a loser? Because I hate to hear comparisons of me with my friends from the people I truly love. Because I don't have a job while my friends are starting to delve into their own careers and get successful, I can't help but to feel hurt when someone is comparing me to them. Though, I deeply know that I am blessed with my husband, with my family, with my marriage, but why there is a sudden feel that I'm no more competitive???

2. What Happens With My Career? 

Since I was a child, many people expected me to be a winner at all times. I never ran away without putting up a good fight because I always want to win. Though I was always the second best in class, people still believe in me especially my family and our family friends.

I was born to be a leader. I never failed to be running in the student council and I never failed to be part of the class officers. That's why people really perceive me as a strong person.

But lately, I'm always asking myself-- if I am always the winner and the leader before, then what happens to me now? What happens with my career? Nowadays, having a stable career has been the measure of success in life. For the past 5 years, my career wasn't that "stable". I've always believed that Communication Arts is a "jack-of-all-trade." Yes, it is, but as what one of my interviewers told me, it's a "master-of-nothing"--- and that's what I've proven now. I may be flexible, but as I browse the Jobstreet, I don't know what specialization I do fit in.

When I resigned in Yellow Cab, many reacted because they so much believed that I got one of the best jobs. Actually, it was my dream job--- a cool boss, a stress-less environment, lots of travel opportunities, plenty of field works, opportunity to meet and greet different well-known personalities in the food business, and the works. However, staying longer entitles me to sacrifice my marriage so even if it breaks my heart, I decided to leave it.

And now, what's going on with my career? It's so hard for me to back on track again. I'm torn with what I will do in my life-- doing a business of my own, be employed in Manila, jobhunt abroad, or be back in school to get my masters. I don't feel to be competitive anymore, and that's what hurts most.

3. How Am I As A Wife?

If I were to rate myself as a wife, I think it's playing between 5 and 8. Sometimes 5 because the "Juan Tamad" in me is at work. Due to the bed weather here in Baguio, all I wanted is to stay in bed, grab my tablet and surf the internet all day. I'm no more productive. But rarely, there are days when I really grade myself with 8 because my husband can't stop me from cooking and cleaning the house. There are times that I'll surprise him with my undying tuna pesto or a house that is super clean that he can't even walk around to avoid messing up the floor.

But seriously, I believe that I've been doing good for the past 9 months of our marriage. We never had a serious fight and the fact that I left everything for him, I think that's truly enough for me to be labeled as a "good" wife.

4. What's In Store For Me In The Future?

Only God knows. I was the type of person who plans my future but I then realize that it's only God who knows and plans my future ahead. As long as I know that my husband loves me and won't let me down, I'm okay with that.

A career and a baby will be the greatest bonus if God gives them to me :-) 

Note to self: Marj, you just have to be positive. No one could tear nor break you apart because you are strong. You are a born-fighter so just fight and never entertain negative thoughts. If any one will bring you down, disconnect with him/her and make him/her feel his lost :-)

 

 

Thoughts on a Plastic

On recent happenings about our nation, some cities have already launched their NO TO PLASTIC projects wherein there is a total plastic ban in the whole area. This is to help save our Mother Earth from the worsening effect of climate change.

On a personal note, I wanna focus this write-up about "plastic" people. Admittedly, they are overly scattered just everywhere. Their population is growing and they're unstoppable. And oops... You might not know it, most in your facebook friend's list are PLASTIC. Most of them just added you to source for information to feed their bitterness. Some might just added you to see your daily updates for them to talk about and laugh at.


But the point is, why are there plastic people? I won't be hypocrite but sometimes there are situations asking me to be one of them in order to avoid hurting others. People sometimes tend to be plastic because it's their only option not to be rude to a certain person. Like if an irritating person approaches you and tries to be close to you, your only choice is to struggle to be as nice as you can be to avoid snobbing and ignoring him/her that will surely hurt him/her.


But come on, there are really people who's being plastic is so innate in them. They pretend to be friends with you for their selfish reasons---- and that's what hurts you most. For the longest time you thought that your friendship is genuine then suddenly you'll learn that they are just using you either for them to get something or for them to be perceived as good because they are friends with you :-(

Disclaimer: This blog was created last July 01, 2011 and posted only now. 

Testing

It's been months since my last entry in this site, and I honestly miss the fulfilment of being able to write and express my thoughts. Since I resigned from my job, I lost track of the latest gadgets and "in" in the world of technology. Lucky me that just last month, husband gave me this Samsung Galaxy Tab P1000. My heart jumped for joy for this wonderful gift. I've tried the site at once but it's only now that I figured out how to post a blog using my tab. Thanks God coz now I'll be able to update it once in a while:-)

Personal Facebook Account Just Deactivated

I am a very sociable person. That's one of my characteristics. I love communicating and that's one of the reasons why I took BA Communication Arts.


I love to talk and express myself. Admittedly, I fully utilize the social networks to vent out my thoughts. And yes, throughout the years, I have so much enjoyed FACEBOOK.


Never did a day pass by that I didn't open my facebook account. It is through here that I share what happen to me everyday by status updates, pictures and videos. It is also my channel to connect with the friends that I haven't seen for so long and also my way to make my friends feel that I am just here either by simply clicking LIKE to their updates or by commenting on their posts.


Truly, Facebook is one of the best social networks ever made in history. To some, it is a "therapy" where they can release emotions. It is really a sort of relief when you express what you have inside, then you feel like the whole world is there to listen to you since a lot of your friends will know what you are undergoing through. But then, facebook has also been a way to "invade privacy". If you aren't careful enough to secure your privacy settings, then everyone (even those you don't know) will be updated of your whole life and it might be a threat to your security. Facebook has also been a medium to ruin relationships. And I am a victim of these things.


Just recently, I discovered that I got a poser in this social network wherein the poser used my married name. I wasn't even able to use that in my personal account because I am not informed that there is a limit in changing names and I already reached the maximum. Then this poser used pictures of my bestfriend and put captions that to those who don't know me will think that there was really something in us. 


Also, some of my relationships with other people related to me were ruined because of facebook due to misunderstandings and indifferent language games. Some of them thought that I was so "maarte" because I even posed random pictures of mine in an ordinary day like  what I eat, how I live, etc. Some also thought that I was taking sides in an issue of a family wherein I just tried to connect with people. My status updates were misunderstood because  some assumed that I was posting that to make "parinig" to someone.


I am so sick of those issues and I only want a peaceful life with my family.


And I am now proud to say that I did it--- I already deactivated my personal facebook account. Some has long believed that I can't do it because they know that it has been my life, but now, I DID IT! Though I know that sooner or later I'm gonna re-activate it (however, I'll make sure that my list of friends doesn't anymore contain fake friends) but then I'm still proud that I had the courage to click the button DEACTIVATE :-)




DISCLAIMER: Yes, even if I deactivated my personal account, I have already created a joint account for my husband and I. But that account is only intended to be kept for close and trusted friends to avoid irritable issues :-) 

Happy 32nd Birthday Husband

When I met you, you were just 21 but I knew you are the one.

Then when you turned 22, I love you is all I knew.








Even you're already 23, we're still not yet 
free.

But at the age of 24, you made me love you even more.

When you were 25, that's when you made me believe that our love will never last.

At your age of 26, you then taught me the art of sacrifice that is never fixed.










Then when you turned 27, you made me feel like I'm in heaven.

You took me to places that made me happiest.

But when you're 28, it was a mixture of love and hate.

As you tuned 29, those were the days when all we did was to attend weddings in line.

At the age of 20, that's when you gave me the dream that I want to be. You proposed a marriage that I've been waiting for ages.

And when you turned 31, finally you are then my husband.

Now that you're turning 32, I just want to be true. Baby I love you even if in the calendar there's no more 32 :p

Happy Birthday Baby. 

I love you so much. 

As the song goes, "Learning to love YOURSELF, it is the greatest love of all", for me that's a hoax.

Because with my 11 years with you, you taught me that "loving your partner with all your heart is the greatest love of all."

Thank you so much baby. I pray that God will grant you so many more years and long life because you are a blessing to others. I don't know how to live without you.

I love you baby. Mwah :-)

We Highly Salute Guards

Why would I say that? Because if not for Mr. Navesteras (hope I got his surname correctly) of SM Baguio, our precious DSLR is already gone. What's more hurtful with the situation was that all the pictures of my younger brother who stayed with us for a vacation were at its memory card. 


Thanks to him because if not, I'm sure Mark and I will really have a silent war for a week. No kidding!

It was last May 27, 2011 when after our tour with my brother at different parts of Baguio, we decided to go to SM to buy his school supplies. When we're about to park, my brother and I went down the car first and let Mark just do the parking. I left the DSLR with him and I saw him placed it at the passenger seat.


After few minutes, he followed us at the department store and shopped also for his stuff. Afterwards, we headed to Yellow Cab to take out pizza for our merienda, then immediately proceeded to the parking lot. 


When I went to the passenger seat, I burst into surprise to see that the window on my side was opened. I confronted Mark and he just acknowledged his fault. Suddenly when he was about to start the engine, I remembered the DSLR. And shoot! It was gone. I panicked and searched the whole car. We didn't know what to do. Thank God I thought of asking my brother to go to the guard and ask for help.


When I saw my brother and the guard approaching, I ran to them panicking and asking the guard, "Kuya may CCTV camera po ba dito kasi po bukas ang bintana ng kotse namin at nawawala ang camera namin!" The guard just replied, "Opo, Ma'am."


So I was a little relieved. 


Then he started telling us, "Ma'am nakita na nga po namin na bukas ang bintana ng kotse nyo.  Nung lumapit po ang kapatid nyo, tinanong po agad namin kung sa inyo ang bagong kotse sa parking. Kanina po kasi nagtataka kami kung bakit may mga lalaking sumisilip sa kotse nyo pero di naman po sinasabi kung bakit. Kaya po nilapitan ko. Nung nakita ko po na yung camera nyo ay nakabungad sa bintana, pina-page po namin kayo gamit ang conduction sticker nyo kasi wala po pala kayong plaka. Nag-decide na lang po ako na kunin muna ang camera kasi po baka po may kumuha pang iba."


And with that, I was fully at ease, especially Mark. So he went with the guard to the office to claim the camera. Inside, the immediate superior of the guard congratulated him and was so proud of him. They even took a picture when the guard handled the camera to Mark.


What made us even prouder was that Mr. Navesteras was so humble that he even shied away from fame. He was so hesitant to have pictures with us and didn't even want to take the small amount of money we gave him as a sign of our gratefulness.


With what happened, we learned few valuable things:

1. Of course, be careful with the belongings and be cautious of everything you do.
2. We should not belittle blue-collared employees because in fact, they were even the better and most dedicated ones when it comes to their jobs.
3. Learn the value of appreciation. 
4. When something bad happens to you, expect that there will be a better one coming up.
5. Don't panic. Think in the most relaxed manner.
6. Never fight your partner at once. Think of solution first.
7. And lastly, check if your car is already locked and if all the windows are closed before leaving your car in the parking area :-)

Kudos to you Mr. Navesteras. We might not had given you the highest appreciation you deserve but it's God who will bless you and your family more for being a good example of honesty and dedication to work.

Ma. Elizabeth Turns 18

Last May 20, 2011, my mom asked me to accompany her in a debut celebration of our neighbor. At first, I was hesitant because I was too tired since I came all the way from Baguio. But due to so much hunger (a little exaggerated), I went with her. I found out that my mom and aunt were part of the program so I decided to bring our DSLR. 


I noticed that there were no official photographers so I volunteered to take pictures as a gift. And this is my first informal photo coverage of an event.

Movies We Watched After Wedding

Since we got married, one of the best bonding times of us aside from eating and making "kulitan" is watching movies. We're now getting used to going to movie house and have some time of quietness since we're busy analyzing (chos! analyzing daw?) the movie. It's easier for us now to see a movie since SM Baguio is so near to us plus the fact that movie here only costs P110 for regular ones, while P250 for 3D.

So far, these are the movies that we've watched together since Dec. 2010.

Isdaan

Because of my previous job in Yellow Cab, I got the chance to try Isdaan in Gerona, Tarlac. Unlike any other restaurants, Isdaan is one of the remarkable places that you could go to. It's like a theme-park wherein you could see large statues of famous Filipino personalities like Erap, Cory Aquino, etc., sleeping security guards, monkeys, and the likes. And of course, it's like a floating restaurant wherein nipa huts are put over a "body of water" with fishes that you could feed.

You'll never get impatient while waiting for your food since you can roam around the place while waiting for your order. For the food, they serve FIlipino dishes that are absolutely sumptuous and so mouthwatering. 

There is also the TACSIYAPO WALL wherein possible persons that you're angry of are written on the wall such as Sister-In-Law, Mother-In-Law, Sipsip, Mareklamong Customer, Manlolokong Asawa. The goal is to throw them anything to release your anger like plates or if you're so mad, you could throw a television on the name. What a great way to release stress and anger, right??!

It's my second time there. The first time I went there was last January 2009 with Bing, my boss. And for the second time last May 20, 2011, I was with my husband. Let me share with you my pictures to better describe my experience in Isdaan. Enjoy :-)

FIRST TIME

SECOND TIME