On Being a Mother

Today I'm on my 21st week and 2nd day of pregnancy.
Ganito pala ang feeling--- di ko maintindihan, di ko maipaliwanag.
Ang hirap matulog sa gabi kasi baka maipit ko si baby.
Lagi akong gutom kahit kakakain lang.
Minsan nakakatamad bumangon para maligo.
Pero mostly, masarap sa pakiramdam kasi para akong prinsesa.


Kaya lang there are times when I feel like I'm useless and worthless.
Gigising ako sa oras na gusto ko, kakain ako pag gutom ako, manonood ako ng TV pag bored na ko, lagi kong hawak ang Blackberry ko para magcheck ng Facebook at Twitter at pag wala na kong mabasa magreresearch na lang about pregnancy, matutulog ako pag biglang inantok... Naiisip ko "yun na lang ba ang gagawin ko?" Minsan I have this feeling of envy sa mga kasing-age ko. Ang iba sa kanila successful na sa kanilang career, yung iba asensado na. May iba pa nga na mas bata pa sa akin pero may sarili ng bahay at kotse, maganda na ang position sa company na pinagtatrabahuhan. Naiisip ko na dati ang taas-taas din ng mga pangarap ko. I'm the type of person who is so competitive and I always want to be on top. But this time bakit naka-tengga lang ako sa bahay, nakahilata? Is this my fate or is this my own choice??? Ang masakit pa when I know that my family is in need, I'm not able to extend my help to them because I'm jobless.


Pero sa tuwing mararamdaman ko ang sipa ng anak ko, naiisip ko na "kelangan ba may trabaho para matawag na successful?" Sa bawat galaw nya sa loob ng tyan ko, he makes me feel that I'm the worthiest person on earth. Sa mga minutong gagalaw sya na para bang nagpapa-tumbling tumbling sa loob, ipinaparamdam nya sa akin na wala akong dapat pagsisihan dahil ito na ang matagal kong pinapangarap. Ano pang dapat kong isiping kakulangan sa akin kung ang pagiging ina ang magpupuno sa lahat ng kulang sa buhay ko. Ang pinakamasarap pa nito ay yung may asawa ako na walang sawang ipinaparamdam sa akin na ako ang isa sa pinakamaswerteng babae sa mundo.


Naalala ko tuloy ang tanong sa akin nung sumali ako sa isang beauty pageant: what is the essence of being a woman? Walang pag-aatubili akong sumagot na "The essence of being a woman is to be a MOTHER." True enough! Di pa man ako nanganganak pero ramdam na ramdam ko na ang halaga ko bilang isang tao.


Naranasan ko na naman halos lahat--- magandang trabaho, productive na buhay, maglibot sa iba't ibang parte ng Pilipinas, nakarating na rin naman ako sa tatlong bansa, nakatulong na rin kahit papaano sa pamilya ko. This time para naman 'to sa amin ng asawa ko.


Sobrang sabik na sabik na kong makita ang anak ko at sigurado akong paglabas nya, maiiba ang pananaw ko sa buhay. Mas lalo kong mararamdaman na may halaga ako bilang si Marjorie Jayne :-)

Major Financial Advices I Learned From Suze Orman

I've never known nor heard of Suze Orman only until last night. I've learned that she is an internationally-acclaimed financial expert and has been running The Suze Orman Show over the years now. I happened to view Korina Sanchez' interview on her via ANC and I suddenly became interested on the major financial advices that she mentioned in the interview.

Let me share with you what I've learned from her.

• Define your needs from wants.

Before buying anything, ask yourself first, "Is this what I need or what I want?" If it's what you want, then go pay it in CASH!

• It is a lot better if you don't own a credit card.

If you purchase something but you don't have the money to pay it in full when the bill comes, then you are in trouble. It's much better if you have debit card.

• Do not buy things to impress the people you don't even like.

Most of us now are so into buying gadgets and other expensive things because we want to go with what's "in". Especially in this hi-tech world of us now, there are lots of gadgets that are out in the market which we are not much aware of that there comes newer models in less than a year. Let's say we buy IPAD now, then IPAD 2 eventually comes out. So our tendency is to go for a newer and much better ones. Little that we know that we don't need them so badly. We just want to have them because we want to impress other people whom we don't even like. And in return, we are the ones suffering in paying those unnecessary things.

• A vacation is not a "happy vacation" when you use your credit card. 

Nowadays it's just so easy to book domestic and international flights online using credit cards. There are lots of promos and seat-sale available which tingle our mind and can not stop us from availing. Well, it's just one easy step-- though credit card. But what if the bill comes before or after the vacation and you don't have the capability to pay that in full, do you think the vacation that you've been wanting for is totally a bliss? Maybe you'll consider it as a misery :-(

• Five members of the family should not be dependent to one member; it should be the other way around. 

It is not good that only one member of the family provides for the rest. It doesn't necessarily mean that all should be employed; but everyone should have the source of income to contribute to the whole family. We all have the capabilities to work, either be employed or do an entrepreneurial job which we could be the boss.

• Teach your children the value of money. 

The world is designed that we must work to get paid. It is more advisable that we teach our children as early as possible how to earn money. Don't give them allowance; instead allow them to do some of the household chores and in return they'll get paid. Start from giving them light chores and pay them 2pesos. Then before they earn much larger money, they have to undergo first from lighter to heavier chores. In that sense, we instill in their minds that we have to work hard to earn money, and eventually they will learn to spend wisely.

• Do not be afraid to talk financial matters with your family. 

Our family is our immediate source of strength and they are also one of the main reasons why we want to earn money. We provide for them and thus, it is just right to be open to our family. We should not be afraid to discuss our financial status with one another and so everyone could adjust and help us.

 As early as possible, we should be able to let our kids know our financial abilities. What we show them is what eventually they will become. If they see us purchasing expensive things, it will be implanted in their minds that they also will do that because that's what they see in us. Let's help our children define who they are by what they have. 

• Between buying or renting a house... 

Evaluate yourself first: Am I able to pay for the amortization fees, monthly dues, government taxes even if I lose my present job??? If yes, then buy a house!

• Invest in health insurance. 

Most of us prioritize to have life insurance to secure our family's future in case we die; but we don't even know that usually before we die, we get ill first. When we get hospitalize, who will pay for our bills? It's still us, so it's better if we secure to have health insurance so that anytime we get sick we'll be able to afford medication.

On the other hand, it is still right to get life insurance so that we will be at peace that they are financially secured when we die. But always remember that we should not list our minor family members as beneficiaries because they won't be able to claim the benefits as long as they are still minors. 

• Invest for your retirement. 

It is not bad to save for yourself even if you have a family to provide for. You've been working hard every day and it is your right to have savings for yourself. Suze Orman has been alarmed by our culture of sending/giving all the earnings that we have to our family. Most of the OFWs have this manner that they don't save up for their own selves. So when the time comes that they can't work anymore and have to go back to the Philippines, they don't have the money to use for their selves. It will then be an additional worry to your family.

• A life worth living for is a simple life with our own house, savings, no debts at all to worry about, and still able to contribute to the church and other community organizations who are also helping us in our lives.

RECONCEPTUALIZING LOVE

*A paperwork I submitted as part of my curriculum in Social Science way back in college.

           What is really meant by the word “love?” Is it a psychological thing which is only in the mind of the people or is it an emotional one which is felt by the heart? There have been so many things said about love. Love, according to the Webster Comprehensive Dictionary, is a strong, complex emotion or feeling causing one to appreciate, delight in, and craves the presence or possession of another and to please or promote the welfare of the other. It is the devoted affection or attachment.

            In my own definition of love, it is giving, sacrificing, and understanding. It is giving because if you love someone your tendency is to make him happy in your side so all you have to do is to give everything that would make him happy. It is not merely receiving because that would mean selfishness and not love. It is sacrificing because loving someone is not always a positive aspect. It will make you experience difficulties and will teach you to surpass all the challenges that you’ll meet as you go on with your relationship. In sacrificing, understanding is associated with it. You can not sacrifice if you don’t understand what you are sacrificing for. You understand because you love. Moreover, for me, love means patience and I do believe that age really doesn’t matter. In addition to that, true love doesn’t see people around you. All you see is yourself together with your loved one and all your dreams that you would like to happen for both of you. You will be blind in everything, in every mistake and in all the bad things that people might say against your relationship. Thus, the statement “Love is blind” is not true because love is not blind but lovers are blind.

            I remember the story of my love life. I’ve been into a relationship for the past three years. If you’ll look at it, it seems that three years is so long. But for us, three years is not yet enough for us to show how much we love each other. We still want to spend a lifetime with each other so that we’ll be able to prove that loving means forever. At first I didn’t believe that his love for me will last this long because the statement “I’ll love you forever!” has been said to me many times and they all failed. But then, as we tread our path of our love story, I come to believe that it is true.  I do not believe in love at first sight. Well, perhaps it was infatuation that I felt when I first saw him. I just met him out of the blue. I accidentally saw him in one of the gatherings that I visited. Then out of nowhere he approached me with something that in fact, he was not the one that I am talking to. I do not also believe in destiny but as I come to think of it, I gradually realized that everything that happens has a reason. I am still holding on to the belief that God allowed me to meet him in that gathering because he is destined for me. I don’t know how I will elaborate the feeling when I have him compared to the other guys that I met before and to the ones that I’ve met nowadays. There is something in our relationship that keeps me to hold on and not give up.

 His first love note for me that I want to share is this:

Everdearest Honeybabe,               Eventhough we’re far apart you’re always in my heart. I love you so much!                                                  Honeybabe

        This simple note had really turned me on. I don’t know why but perhaps it was because he surprisingly gave that to me. He put it in the book that I borrowed from him and I saw it when he was gone. As I repeatedly read the note, I can’t help but to compare it with the other love notes that I received before. This one is rather simple but has a deep meaning compared to the others that have a very complex sentences, deep-meaning words, messages that have full of compliments about me, and things that they can do for me. This note of him is very direct. He is saying that though he is far from me, I would still be in his heart. He said that because I was in Batangas studying and he was in Manila working. Moreover, we were separated by our own parents and the people around us. He is six years older than me. I was then a high school student and a member of Youth for Christ while he was a working man and a member of Singles for Christ. In our status, our differences are easily recognized. People were saying that our relationship will not last for long because of our age gap and our distance from each other. Everybody was against us. It is only the two of us who keep on fighting for it and no one was there for us. Our story resembles that of Romeo and Juliet. Our parents were the primary hindrance in our relationship. Before, they were friends but when they find out that we are having an affair they became great enemies. This is just a part of our story and the rest is history.

                   

               With this I learned that loving someone requires patience so that everybody will accept it.  Our story has taught me that sacrificing is one of the elements of love. Loving, as what I’ve mentioned earlier, is not always positive in everything. It does not necessarily mean that if your in-love you’ll be happy for the rest of it. You also have to understand the reason for all that happens. But the most important of it is that both of you understands each other.

                My perception about love has even become stronger when I read the article of Ken Raggio, a 35-year pastor, counselor, and preacher. In his article, he said that love is essential to all perfect relationships. But then, true love is not always romantic. “Romance adds the perfume and the colors. Romance embellishes the scenery and swells the music. Romance is the gilding of love. Romance is gold leaf. It is ornamentation. Romance sometimes becomes a means unto self. It even becomes a cheap substitute for love at all times…Romance is skin deep. Love is heart deep. Romance requires things that love does not require. Romance requires gifts and surprises and lavish attention…”

              “Love is for givers, not getters. Those who demand to be loved before they will love shouldn’t be surprised if no one gives them love. Lovers live in a world of giving. The getters, the ones who are looking for love, are of different world. We have the duty to love, but we have no guarantees that we will be loved. We have it in our power to love, but we have no power to force others to love us. It is folly to spend life demanding love from others. If we are true lovers, our entire mindset is in a giving mode…” 

              Truly, we often equate love and romance. Even my own self had that notion. At first I felt so in love with the guys who used to give me abundant attention and lots of gifts. Honestly, one of the things that made me felt so much in love with my boyfriend is the fact that he made me feel so special by giving expensive gifts and lots of surprises. His full attention is with me. Every time he goes home in Batangas, he gives me small stuffs and during our monthsaries, he gives me different material gifts (Girbaud bags, wallets, Guess shirt, and the likes) and also flowers and foods. I really felt so special that time because my classmates and friends were all envy to me. They kept on praying that they might found a man like mine. In addition, I felt that romantic moments will be the factor that will keep our relationship strong. But as years passed by, I realized that expensive gifts, surprises, and attention, as well as romantic moments do not matter at all. In fact, they were all just bonuses. What keep our relationship stronger are the challenges and problems that we have undergone. We have proven that loving is giving but not giving material things. It is giving the needs of your partner that will enable both parties to grow and become mature. It is giving the fulfillment of one’s emptiness.

             “Love requires the giving of one’s self to another. It involves an element of self-depletion, self-exhaustion. Love is emphatic. It puts itself in someone else’s shoes. Love seeks to understand. Love cares. It does not pre-judge. It does not pass sentences. Love does not jump to conclusions. Love does not throw down ultimatums. Love does not declare war on its object. Love is tender, it is kind, and it is forgiving.”

               Every where I go and whoever I talk to about love, they always say that in loving a person, understanding every little stuff about him is necessary. It is also as better as saying “Love means accepting the person for whatever and whoever he/she is.” And I think this is the best definition of love because true love is unconditional. It is not important to know his educational and family background, his intellectual capacity, and all his abilities. What matters most is the emotional thing that you have for him inside your heart. It is not important to learn first the things he can give and do for you. It is better to know first the things you can do for him. Are you willing to sacrifice for him? Are you willing to risk your heart for him? Can you fight for him? Can you accept him for who and what he is? Are you willing to commit your love to him? Is he the man whom you want to spend the rest of your life with? These are the things that you must better assess than knowing his answers to these questions. You must also learn to forgive because committing into love also means that you are willing to forgive. Sacrificing, understanding, and forgiving are three connected actions related to love.

             “Love is tuning into another’s sensitivities. Love sense’s another’s strengths and weaknesses. It uses the other person’s measuring stick. It suffers and rejoices on another’s terms. Love seeks rapport. It seeks to interface with another at their level. It seeks to relate emotionally, intellectually, physically, and spiritually. Love compromises whenever possible. Love sacrifices personal whims if they are incompatible with the one who is loved. Love abandons pursuits that hurt the one who is loved. Love will do without. Love will dress in the color that another chooses. Love bends. Love stretches. Love must sometimes keep silent. Love is a desire that someone will fare better than yourself. It is the willingness to spend yourself for the well-being of another. Love will pay a debt the other cannot pay. It will bail them out for the sake of survival. Love wants the other to survive even if it means to death to self. Love will die so someone else can live.”

              I remember one his letters. It contains this message: IF I’LL DIE BEFORE YOU DO, I’LL GO TO HEAVEN AND WAIT FOR YOU! My interpretation of this is that he would rather choose to be the first to leave this world than me and then we will just continue our relationship in heaven. There, happiness is eternal and there would be no problems at all. This message of him is about death but there is still love after death. It simply means that his love for me will really last forever.

              In loving, you must learn to be flexible, to adjust to your partner. When you commit into something, it automatically means that you’ll be willing to do everything for it. So when you commit into love, you must be willing to adjust yourself for your partner. Remember that you have chosen to love him so you must make it a point that you’ll be able to be flexible in order to fulfill his needs.

              When I was twelve years old, I do not believe to people saying that they are willing to die for their loved one. For me at that time, my belief was that our loved one who also loves us has the same wants as we have. He may also want the best for us and may be willing to give his life for us. Thus, why are we going to die for him if our death will cause so much pain for him? But then his death may also cause our suffering but not too much because we have seen the cause of his death; that there is a reason why he was gone. Well, that was way back my elementary years. When I experience love, especially the love I now have with my boyfriend, I come to appreciate fully the real meaning of love and that is what I’m always mentioning…sacrifice.

               “Love will expose you to rejection and hurts. Your attempts at loving someone will not always be appreciated or received kindly. Your motives may not be understood or believed…When you love you are the most vulnerable to hurt. Sharing your love is the most expensive thing you will ever do. It can either be the most rewarding effort or it can be the most devastating endeavor. Nobody is happier than a person in love. Nobody is sadder than one whose love has failed.”

               It is true that not at all times you’ll be successful in love. It takes so much pain and risk before having the perfect love. Some might reject you and misinterpret your objectives. Some may underestimate or overestimate your capabilities. But you know what, that is the magic of love. You may feel all the sufferings and rejections you can ever have in this world, but when you finally found the one, the perfect one, every little pain in your heart will be soothed. You’ll forget all the moments when you are down because when you found the right one, it seems that you are in heaven.

                 In summing up all of these, love means sacrificing, understanding, giving, forgiving, adjusting, waiting, and taking all the risks. But the best of all these is that “love is accepting.” Accepting your partner for who and what he is and not for what he can give is the best meaning of love for me. True love means forever. You don’t have to search for it; it will come. As one of the quotes says, “Life is so short to waste time for someone who is unworthy of your love. It’s so sad when the right person won’t be able to come to you because you’re busy all your life making the wrong person right for you.”  When you found the right person, do all your best to apply all the verbs mentioned about love. Bear in mind, “true love doesn’t have a happy ending because true love doesn’t have an ending.”

An Early Christmas Blessing

"The best surprises are those that come without even a single hint."

Nov. 20, 2010 - That was the morning that marked another milestone in our married life. Weeks before that day, I was feeling a bit uneasy at work, in my everyday life. I always felt nauseaous that I almost threw up everything that I ate. I then realized that I was a bit sensitive when it comes to smell. I often noticed how my seatmate in the jeepney smelled or even got irritated with the smoke coming from cigarettes.

From the whole week before Nov.20, I even climbed stairs, lifted heavy furnitures from third to ground floor, and I even joined a 3KM fun run. I never thought that I am pregnant not until people around me were noticing the symptoms that I kept telling them. So they convinced me to have pregnancy test.

By Nov.20 husband and I were supposed to attend a mass but I had a terrible stomach pain so he went alone and I asked him to purchase a pregnancy kit. I kept waiting for him even if I was in a hurry to urinate because the first drop of urine should be used for the test. So when husband arrived, I rushed to the comfort room and did the test. Deep inside me is an expectation that it will turn out positive, and lucky as we are, it really resulted to POSITIVE. I didn't know how to react and how to tell husband. Outside Mark was also nervous how it will turn out, so when I went out the CR, I just nodded and uttered, "POSITIVE".

We didn't know how to tell our families. My husband was also speechless not like the usual scenes that I saw in Tagalog movies that when a man discovers he's gonna be a father, he'll jump for joy and will shout to the neighborhood that he's already a dad. Mark was the other way around. He was quiet. Little did I know that he was already calling his mom and his sister. I was shocked and in disbelief at first. I was afraid to broadcast it at once because it may be false alarm, the kit may just be not real. Then I learned that Mark only bought it for 50pesos so I asked him to buy a more expensive one to confirm that it's really positive. But afterwards, the symptoms that I experienced for the past week confirmed that I really am pregnant.

So we couldn't wait to broadcast it. Mark was even the one to instruct me to take a picture and post it in Facebook. He even had the consciousness to put powder on his face, and me, I was still in awe.

It was five days ago since we first knew that I am pregnant and for that five days, it was totally a roller coaster experience. I was in pain for the past 4 days and it was only today that I felt good. I was advised to have a bedrest, and eventually, I even filed resignation. I couldn't afford to have a work but risk the safety of my baby.

So far, I don't have specific cravings. I just crave for everything that I see. My sensitivity to smell becomes stronger. I hate the smell of any cooking procedures especially instant pancit canton, sauteed product, and bellpepper. My emotions and mood swings are more recognizable these days. When I cry, I really cry hard that it's so hard for me to stop. When I'm happy, I'm totally happy. I feel more special these days because everyone's taking care of me, concerned about me, and exerting effort to give my cravings. This is one of the advantages of being pregnant. When my tummy aches, I couldn't stop from crying but I just think that God allows me to feel that way for me to be reminded that there is a life inside my system.

Truly this is such an early Christmas blessing and it comes to a real surprise. God is so good.


Sent from my Blackberry

Contemplating...

Lately, perhaps due to the changing weather, I've been contemplating about my life--- what am I now, what happens with my career, how am I as a wife, and what's in store for me in the future.


1. What Am I Now?

I am Mrs. Marjorie Jayne Pacis-Villamar, Mark Johnson's loving wife. That's how I only see myself, nothing more. Even the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Ricardo Pacis and an older sister to Ricky Jay and Neil Joseph, I don't see myself as those anymore. 

Oh yes, since I got married, I decided to relocate with my husband and leave the old me. I wanted to start all over again with my husband and begin building our own family. That's what I simply wanted--- to be the best wife and to be a mother soon. 

But why do I feel like I am a loser? Because I hate to hear comparisons of me with my friends from the people I truly love. Because I don't have a job while my friends are starting to delve into their own careers and get successful, I can't help but to feel hurt when someone is comparing me to them. Though, I deeply know that I am blessed with my husband, with my family, with my marriage, but why there is a sudden feel that I'm no more competitive???

2. What Happens With My Career? 

Since I was a child, many people expected me to be a winner at all times. I never ran away without putting up a good fight because I always want to win. Though I was always the second best in class, people still believe in me especially my family and our family friends.

I was born to be a leader. I never failed to be running in the student council and I never failed to be part of the class officers. That's why people really perceive me as a strong person.

But lately, I'm always asking myself-- if I am always the winner and the leader before, then what happens to me now? What happens with my career? Nowadays, having a stable career has been the measure of success in life. For the past 5 years, my career wasn't that "stable". I've always believed that Communication Arts is a "jack-of-all-trade." Yes, it is, but as what one of my interviewers told me, it's a "master-of-nothing"--- and that's what I've proven now. I may be flexible, but as I browse the Jobstreet, I don't know what specialization I do fit in.

When I resigned in Yellow Cab, many reacted because they so much believed that I got one of the best jobs. Actually, it was my dream job--- a cool boss, a stress-less environment, lots of travel opportunities, plenty of field works, opportunity to meet and greet different well-known personalities in the food business, and the works. However, staying longer entitles me to sacrifice my marriage so even if it breaks my heart, I decided to leave it.

And now, what's going on with my career? It's so hard for me to back on track again. I'm torn with what I will do in my life-- doing a business of my own, be employed in Manila, jobhunt abroad, or be back in school to get my masters. I don't feel to be competitive anymore, and that's what hurts most.

3. How Am I As A Wife?

If I were to rate myself as a wife, I think it's playing between 5 and 8. Sometimes 5 because the "Juan Tamad" in me is at work. Due to the bed weather here in Baguio, all I wanted is to stay in bed, grab my tablet and surf the internet all day. I'm no more productive. But rarely, there are days when I really grade myself with 8 because my husband can't stop me from cooking and cleaning the house. There are times that I'll surprise him with my undying tuna pesto or a house that is super clean that he can't even walk around to avoid messing up the floor.

But seriously, I believe that I've been doing good for the past 9 months of our marriage. We never had a serious fight and the fact that I left everything for him, I think that's truly enough for me to be labeled as a "good" wife.

4. What's In Store For Me In The Future?

Only God knows. I was the type of person who plans my future but I then realize that it's only God who knows and plans my future ahead. As long as I know that my husband loves me and won't let me down, I'm okay with that.

A career and a baby will be the greatest bonus if God gives them to me :-) 

Note to self: Marj, you just have to be positive. No one could tear nor break you apart because you are strong. You are a born-fighter so just fight and never entertain negative thoughts. If any one will bring you down, disconnect with him/her and make him/her feel his lost :-)

 

 

Thoughts on a Plastic

On recent happenings about our nation, some cities have already launched their NO TO PLASTIC projects wherein there is a total plastic ban in the whole area. This is to help save our Mother Earth from the worsening effect of climate change.

On a personal note, I wanna focus this write-up about "plastic" people. Admittedly, they are overly scattered just everywhere. Their population is growing and they're unstoppable. And oops... You might not know it, most in your facebook friend's list are PLASTIC. Most of them just added you to source for information to feed their bitterness. Some might just added you to see your daily updates for them to talk about and laugh at.


But the point is, why are there plastic people? I won't be hypocrite but sometimes there are situations asking me to be one of them in order to avoid hurting others. People sometimes tend to be plastic because it's their only option not to be rude to a certain person. Like if an irritating person approaches you and tries to be close to you, your only choice is to struggle to be as nice as you can be to avoid snobbing and ignoring him/her that will surely hurt him/her.


But come on, there are really people who's being plastic is so innate in them. They pretend to be friends with you for their selfish reasons---- and that's what hurts you most. For the longest time you thought that your friendship is genuine then suddenly you'll learn that they are just using you either for them to get something or for them to be perceived as good because they are friends with you :-(

Disclaimer: This blog was created last July 01, 2011 and posted only now. 

Testing

It's been months since my last entry in this site, and I honestly miss the fulfilment of being able to write and express my thoughts. Since I resigned from my job, I lost track of the latest gadgets and "in" in the world of technology. Lucky me that just last month, husband gave me this Samsung Galaxy Tab P1000. My heart jumped for joy for this wonderful gift. I've tried the site at once but it's only now that I figured out how to post a blog using my tab. Thanks God coz now I'll be able to update it once in a while:-)

Personal Facebook Account Just Deactivated

I am a very sociable person. That's one of my characteristics. I love communicating and that's one of the reasons why I took BA Communication Arts.


I love to talk and express myself. Admittedly, I fully utilize the social networks to vent out my thoughts. And yes, throughout the years, I have so much enjoyed FACEBOOK.


Never did a day pass by that I didn't open my facebook account. It is through here that I share what happen to me everyday by status updates, pictures and videos. It is also my channel to connect with the friends that I haven't seen for so long and also my way to make my friends feel that I am just here either by simply clicking LIKE to their updates or by commenting on their posts.


Truly, Facebook is one of the best social networks ever made in history. To some, it is a "therapy" where they can release emotions. It is really a sort of relief when you express what you have inside, then you feel like the whole world is there to listen to you since a lot of your friends will know what you are undergoing through. But then, facebook has also been a way to "invade privacy". If you aren't careful enough to secure your privacy settings, then everyone (even those you don't know) will be updated of your whole life and it might be a threat to your security. Facebook has also been a medium to ruin relationships. And I am a victim of these things.


Just recently, I discovered that I got a poser in this social network wherein the poser used my married name. I wasn't even able to use that in my personal account because I am not informed that there is a limit in changing names and I already reached the maximum. Then this poser used pictures of my bestfriend and put captions that to those who don't know me will think that there was really something in us. 


Also, some of my relationships with other people related to me were ruined because of facebook due to misunderstandings and indifferent language games. Some of them thought that I was so "maarte" because I even posed random pictures of mine in an ordinary day like  what I eat, how I live, etc. Some also thought that I was taking sides in an issue of a family wherein I just tried to connect with people. My status updates were misunderstood because  some assumed that I was posting that to make "parinig" to someone.


I am so sick of those issues and I only want a peaceful life with my family.


And I am now proud to say that I did it--- I already deactivated my personal facebook account. Some has long believed that I can't do it because they know that it has been my life, but now, I DID IT! Though I know that sooner or later I'm gonna re-activate it (however, I'll make sure that my list of friends doesn't anymore contain fake friends) but then I'm still proud that I had the courage to click the button DEACTIVATE :-)




DISCLAIMER: Yes, even if I deactivated my personal account, I have already created a joint account for my husband and I. But that account is only intended to be kept for close and trusted friends to avoid irritable issues :-) 

Happy 32nd Birthday Husband

When I met you, you were just 21 but I knew you are the one.

Then when you turned 22, I love you is all I knew.








Even you're already 23, we're still not yet 
free.

But at the age of 24, you made me love you even more.

When you were 25, that's when you made me believe that our love will never last.

At your age of 26, you then taught me the art of sacrifice that is never fixed.










Then when you turned 27, you made me feel like I'm in heaven.

You took me to places that made me happiest.

But when you're 28, it was a mixture of love and hate.

As you tuned 29, those were the days when all we did was to attend weddings in line.

At the age of 20, that's when you gave me the dream that I want to be. You proposed a marriage that I've been waiting for ages.

And when you turned 31, finally you are then my husband.

Now that you're turning 32, I just want to be true. Baby I love you even if in the calendar there's no more 32 :p

Happy Birthday Baby. 

I love you so much. 

As the song goes, "Learning to love YOURSELF, it is the greatest love of all", for me that's a hoax.

Because with my 11 years with you, you taught me that "loving your partner with all your heart is the greatest love of all."

Thank you so much baby. I pray that God will grant you so many more years and long life because you are a blessing to others. I don't know how to live without you.

I love you baby. Mwah :-)

We Highly Salute Guards

Why would I say that? Because if not for Mr. Navesteras (hope I got his surname correctly) of SM Baguio, our precious DSLR is already gone. What's more hurtful with the situation was that all the pictures of my younger brother who stayed with us for a vacation were at its memory card. 


Thanks to him because if not, I'm sure Mark and I will really have a silent war for a week. No kidding!

It was last May 27, 2011 when after our tour with my brother at different parts of Baguio, we decided to go to SM to buy his school supplies. When we're about to park, my brother and I went down the car first and let Mark just do the parking. I left the DSLR with him and I saw him placed it at the passenger seat.


After few minutes, he followed us at the department store and shopped also for his stuff. Afterwards, we headed to Yellow Cab to take out pizza for our merienda, then immediately proceeded to the parking lot. 


When I went to the passenger seat, I burst into surprise to see that the window on my side was opened. I confronted Mark and he just acknowledged his fault. Suddenly when he was about to start the engine, I remembered the DSLR. And shoot! It was gone. I panicked and searched the whole car. We didn't know what to do. Thank God I thought of asking my brother to go to the guard and ask for help.


When I saw my brother and the guard approaching, I ran to them panicking and asking the guard, "Kuya may CCTV camera po ba dito kasi po bukas ang bintana ng kotse namin at nawawala ang camera namin!" The guard just replied, "Opo, Ma'am."


So I was a little relieved. 


Then he started telling us, "Ma'am nakita na nga po namin na bukas ang bintana ng kotse nyo.  Nung lumapit po ang kapatid nyo, tinanong po agad namin kung sa inyo ang bagong kotse sa parking. Kanina po kasi nagtataka kami kung bakit may mga lalaking sumisilip sa kotse nyo pero di naman po sinasabi kung bakit. Kaya po nilapitan ko. Nung nakita ko po na yung camera nyo ay nakabungad sa bintana, pina-page po namin kayo gamit ang conduction sticker nyo kasi wala po pala kayong plaka. Nag-decide na lang po ako na kunin muna ang camera kasi po baka po may kumuha pang iba."


And with that, I was fully at ease, especially Mark. So he went with the guard to the office to claim the camera. Inside, the immediate superior of the guard congratulated him and was so proud of him. They even took a picture when the guard handled the camera to Mark.


What made us even prouder was that Mr. Navesteras was so humble that he even shied away from fame. He was so hesitant to have pictures with us and didn't even want to take the small amount of money we gave him as a sign of our gratefulness.


With what happened, we learned few valuable things:

1. Of course, be careful with the belongings and be cautious of everything you do.
2. We should not belittle blue-collared employees because in fact, they were even the better and most dedicated ones when it comes to their jobs.
3. Learn the value of appreciation. 
4. When something bad happens to you, expect that there will be a better one coming up.
5. Don't panic. Think in the most relaxed manner.
6. Never fight your partner at once. Think of solution first.
7. And lastly, check if your car is already locked and if all the windows are closed before leaving your car in the parking area :-)

Kudos to you Mr. Navesteras. We might not had given you the highest appreciation you deserve but it's God who will bless you and your family more for being a good example of honesty and dedication to work.